Why Jason Kelce ‘Wouldn’t Allow’ Kylie to Do an Official Roast of Him

Jason Kelce has no interest in a public skewering at the hands of his wife, Kylie Kelce.

After Netflix’s The Roast of Tom Brady aired all of the NFL legend’s dirty laundry for the world to see, Jason, 36, wondered why anybody would subject themselves to such torment.

“It was pure entertainment,” Jason said Wednesday, May 8, on his “New Heights” podcast. “I’m really happy they did it. But I just do not get the roasts. I don’t understand why people do them.”

Jason added, “Maybe I just take myself too seriously.”

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The night was a rough one for Brady, 46, who endured jokes about his playing career, his appearance and, perhaps most aggressively, his relationships with ex-girlfriend Bridget Moynahan and ex-wife Gisele Bündchen.

“My family’s ruined. It’s so funny!” Jason joked about what Brady must have been thinking. “Everyone’s laughing, it’s great! We’re all having fun, right?”

Despite his reluctance, Jason and brother Travis Kelce discussed who they’d want to roast them if Netflix ever came calling.

“If I was picking who to roast me, I would pick people that I would have no problem getting into a fistfight with,” Jason explained. “Family members, I mean. Dad can roast me, but I would beat the f–k out of Dad when the camera turns off.”

However, Jason indicated that his invitation wouldn’t extend to all of his family members.

“The one person I wouldn’t allow on the stage is Kylie,” Jason noted. “She has way too much. I cannot allow that.”

Travis, 34, agreed, saying that Kylie, 32, would “f–kin’ torch you.”

“Every day I’m getting roasted by Kylie,” Jason said. “I don’t need her to go up on stage and do that.”

As for Travis, he had a trio of comedians who he’d like to participate in his hypothetical roast.

“[Andrew] Santino is one of my favorite comedians of all time. I think he would f–king deliver,” Travis said. “Dave Chappelle is the all-time great. Kevin Hart. I would love for Kevin just to go up there and f–kin’ rip me in half.”

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While we shouldn’t expect to see Kylie on a roast stage anytime soon, Jason did reveal that he followed through on Travis’ suggestion that he get Kylie a sword to celebrate their six-year wedding anniversary, which the couple celebrated last month.

“We got the sword,” Jason said. “Kylie loves it.”

Jason proudly displayed the gift to his brother, who called it “a nice-ass sword.”

“It’s really not,” Jason countered. “I’ve seen better. It’s not that sharp. But it’s for show. It’s a symbol.”

Still, Travis joked that the sword might lead to a “Robert Durst situation” in which Kylie kills Jason “in the basement with the iron sword.”

“I gotta be honest with you,” Jason said. “If Kylie killed me with a sword, I had it coming to me. No need to punish her.”